❂ fifth | accidental video post

[gazingup]

[ the camera snaps on, revealing Tristan carefully examining an object in his hand - it's green, shaped like a ping pong ball, and unmistakeably a mushroom. ]

But it's just a mushroom!

...Still, they say it's a mushroom that can bring someone back to life. I can't say I need it and hope to never, but it'd be awfully useful to have. Only a fool would throw it away, really.

What odd luck, though I'm certainly not compl-

[ a deep roar clips off the end of his sentence. The timbre can only belong to that of the King Queen of the Jungle-- a motherfucking lion.]

Wh- What- What was that? Oh god, why is there- why is there a lion sitting on the couch?

[ The video pans out to focus on the animal sitting there comfortably on the sofa. She seems unperturbed and rather unimpressed by Tristan's ruckus and clatter. Also, she may have just rolled her eyes, or at least as close to an eyeroll a lion can manage. ]

Calm yourself, Tristan.

Calm? You're telling me to be calm! There's a bloody lioness in my home. I left the forest to avoid lions, now- now they come wandering into my house!

And am I ever glad about that. An entire month spent living in a forest? We are not animals.

You're- You. You're talking to me right now, aren't you?

What do you see before you?

[ pauuuuse. ]

Yvaine! Get the meat from the ice box! Hurry, there should be some left over from-

Please calm down before you hurt yourself, Tristan.

I am reasonably calm considering the situation! Honestly, get out of here-

[ A heavy, rectangular object flies into the camera's view, hitting the unimpressed lion in the back. Seems like Tristan had a sudden spark of courage, too bad it comes with unfortunate results. The camera switches to focus on Tristan, who's currently bent over and nursing a bruise on his back. ]

OW! Ow. Jesus Christ. What the hell was that?

I have to admit. The only reason I didn't dodge was for that reaction.

Comments

video

[freckleddoll]

[someone's staring wide-eyed at the lioness]

video

[gazingup.livejournal.com]

Hm?

video

[freckleddoll]

[a small squeak of surprise at being spoken to]

video

[gazingup.livejournal.com]

I- I won't let you eat the girl!

video

[gazingup.livejournal.com]

I am not going to eat her, Tristan. You're being unnecessarily dramatic.

video

[freckleddoll]

Don' want t'be eaten!

AUDIO IN THE BACKGROUND PROBABLY

[shiningdown.livejournal.com]

Stop making such a racket, Tristan!

audio

[gazingup.livejournal.com]

THERE IS A BLOODY LION IN OUR APARTMENT.

audio

[shiningdown.livejournal.com]

Yes, and she's being quite civil, unlike certain others.

audio

[gazingup.livejournal.com]

But that doesn't change the fact that she's a lion! With claws! And sharp, pointy teeth! And a stomach that's waiting to be filled with flesh!

[gazingup.livejournal.com]

I may have to change to something smaller, if he continues with this display. My apologies, Yvaine. Among other apologies he owes you.

A mouse would work.

[anoblemouse.livejournal.com]

Eat him and relieve us from this headache.

[gazingup.livejournal.com]

Cats like to chase mice, don't they?

[primrosella.livejournal.com]

Oh, she's a lion, is she? My, I never would have guessed it.

SORRY FOR THE LATE TAG sob and yes his daemon hasn't setttled yet >_>

[gazingup.livejournal.com]

It is the form I prefer. Something smaller might make Tristan scream less, but I certainly don't want to change.

[gazingup.livejournal.com]

...You can change forms? Why not- Why not change into a sparrow and fly out of here?

HAHAHAHAHA OH TRISTAN

[primrosella.livejournal.com]

And a fine one at that. I was very nearly a lion, myself.

Does he really not recognize you?

WEEP

[gazingup.livejournal.com]

No, not yet. I suppose it's because he's not used to me being out and seems to busy panicking to properly think.

I hope it won't take too long.

1/2

[gazingup.livejournal.com]

Rosella's bird? Why- Why is Rosella's bird talking to me?

2/2

[gazingup.livejournal.com]

What guessing is there to do? She is a lion, from tip to tail- only an idiot wouldn't recognize that.

[primrosella.livejournal.com]

Then I suppose lions must suit you, Tristan. Which is what I wouldn't have guessed.

Almeisan, be nice or I'm taking that device away.

[gazingup.livejournal.com]

Suit me? Suit me because they find human flesh appetizing?

Are you sure he's not some breed of parrot, Rosella? Birds aren't supposed to talk. Well, neither are lions.

[ Video ]

[brainsnotfists.livejournal.com]

[A small child with cat ears is giggling at you]

[gazingup.livejournal.com]

...It honestly- It honestly isn't funny, you know.

[brainsnotfists.livejournal.com]

Yes it is! You're silly, 'cause she isn't hurting you and you're acting all scared when she just wants to talk to you.